Morbid Metaphors, from Marion Dreyfus
Life we take for granted,
we still horripilate at the scent of our end [Have a Will?]
When we think of the thanatic
We freq become emphatic
Docs, like folks of other sort
have devised abbrevs to retort
Thus a man deemed NGMI
Is a Not Gonna Make It guy;
ART, or Approaching Room Temp, means Dead
[or so it's said]
Far less dire, SIO, now don't scoff
happily translates to Sleeping It Off
Contrarily, that mess covered with a bloody cape
Is a patient in PBS, Pretty Bad Shape
Another way to put it
Is FTD, Fixin' to Die
Despite the best efforts of meds 'n' docs all day
He might still be GDA — Gonna Die Anyway
Some patients then become GPO
Good Parts Only: lungs, veins, scro'. . .
Should you find them sluggish, full of lead
They're now GRAFOB, Grim Reaper at Foot of Bed
If patient expires, Paws Up, PU,
Take a hard look at the consequent view:
His LRO, Luck Ran Out, his blood once red
now, alas, HBD, He just Be Dead
"Discharged downstairs" means sent to morgue
to celestial transfer. Please don't forgue
At scenes of accident, he's DOTS
Dead on the Spot, zero finesse
If the crash was gruesome, no breath to spare
he'll be DRTTT, or Deceased Right There, There and There
Beating Off Angels, or BOA, as docs arrive
Is CPR on hopeless folks who won't survive
Yet there's hope, CD, as there's the Coffin Dodger
eluding inept KHB, Knife-Happy Blade, a surgeon botcher
The hurt may prevail over horrendoectomy
the lasting surgical result of foreverectomy
But sometimes, DTTM, the worst to bod or chromosome
comes to Don't Transfer to Me! patients with LWS –
Low Wallet Syndrome